Back for round two ..
Ayeeeeee, it’s go day!
It’s 6:45am, and I awake with a smile on my face, a sweet spirit, and a word on my heart. Proverbs 17:22 says "A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." Wait, where did that come from? My grandmother always says that He gives you the word that you need when you need it. Clearly this word matches my whole vibe today. Yesssss, I am a whole mood! I pick up my phone from the night stand and read through messages, prayers, and songs wishing me well for treatment #2. I am so grateful for my village. This also includes the thoughts and prayers that don’t come to my screen. I feel y’all too!
As I’m lying there, I’m reminded of a text that I received last night from my friends in Spin class, showing their support. And instantly, my eyes well up with tears. You guys are turning me into such a big softie with your overwhelming acts of kindness.
I lie there for a few moments more, thinking back on all of these wonderful expressions of love .. prayers, calls, messages, visits, meals, flowers, gifts, and so much more … and my heart is so full. I appreciate each and every act. Nothing is too small.
Deciding if it’s time to get out of the bed, my mind is filled with memories made since the last treatment. The laughs, the cries, the joy, the pain .. I breathe them all in and give myself a pat on the back. Good job Tova. One treatment down. Then I hear Sydney’s footsteps, as she comes downstairs to greet me before school. “Mom, Good luck with chemo today even though you don’t need it.” I just smile at her, “Thanks babe.” Then we do our chemo fight dance. I’ll have to record it so y’all can see our moves. Y’all ain’t ready. 😜
Ok, I’m up now… I drink my water to the 9am mark because Dahki is a stalker. Now that he’s back in school, he keeps tabs on me. 🙄 He’ll text at any given moment requesting proof that I’m on track with my water intake.
I mean really, who’s the parent here?
Time to get this day started. My morning concert awaits. It takes me 67 minutes to get through my playlist these days .. with all the songs that you guys have sent me. I’ll need two playlists soon. As the music plays, I walk into my closet to choose a comfy chemo fit. Ash told me to wear a v neck next time so they can access my port easily. Hmmm, I’m not a v neck type of chic. I think an off the shoulder serves the same purpose. Listen, breast cancer is not about to compromise my style. Okurrrrr!
I still have a few hours to go before the chemo party starts. So, it’s probably a good idea to get something in my stomach. I have a taste for Shrimp and grits, and who knows what my appetite will be like after chemo. So I gather the troops, and off we go.
Tay (cousin), Grandma, Ruthie (aunt), and meeeeeee at Another Broken Egg
We arrived at Houston Methodist shortly before 1pm .. and I am ready to get the party started. Ruthie drops off my grandmother and me at the front door, as she and Tay park the car. We walk into the Infusion center, and I am greeted by name when I walk in. After a brief exchange of hellos, Ruthie and Tay join us in the waiting area. A few minutes later, we are escorted to this week’s party location, Room 12. (where the players dwell ..if you get it, you get it 🙃) So today’s nurse isn’t Ash. Her name is Phoebe. She’s warm and friendly.. and what’s that I hear .. FUNNY. (Phoebe is also a ball of fun, but time would reveal just how much fun .. a few hours later.)
First things first, I need to be weighed before the lab work. I already know what the scale will say. I can not even pretend that the scale is lying today. Honeyyyyy, I have eaten every snack, meal, dessert, and treat sent to me over the last two weeks. So, if those numbers on that scale don’t move, Houston Methodist needs to invest in some new equipment. Just as I thought, the number is higher, but not by much. No worries, I already have a plan to get that together. If you recall from one of my previous blog entries, I’ve concluded that this weight gain (or more importantly .. the associated behavior) is purely fear activated. It is not of faith! In my head, I rationalized that I needed to eat whatever, because the next day I would probably become nauseous .. the next day I probably wouldn’t have an appetite .. the next day I would probably start to have the “metal taste”in my mouth and not be able to enjoy food .. the next day I would probably not be able to eat spicy food, and so on and so on.. This went on for 2 weeks, and the “next day” never came. So when I look back in my prayers, prior to starting my first session, I recall that I requested that He spare me of these things. I asked that He keep me strong so that I can reap the full benefit of the chemotherapy. And then I went on ahead eating like He wasn't going to do what I asked of Him. So, guess what … now I have some unwanted pounds as a result of it. I think it’s only fair. I mean, it’s not like I “intentionally” discounted Him.. But a discount is a discount. And in this moment, I am thankful for clarity.
“And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith ”
Room 12 is a bit cozier than our previous suite. But it’s ok; it’s more than enough for us. Phoebe needs to access my port so that she can draw blood for the lab work. If you recall, they need to test vital functions before I can be approved for this week’s chemo treatment. She asks if I had numbed the area with the Lidocaine that they had prescribed. “Yep, all done,” secretly praying that I’d done it correctly. Now it’s time to begin. I count almost 20 sterilized packages of little plastic doohickies that Phoebe will use to access the port that Ash made ever so clear is “connected directly to my heart.” She flips open this paper folder that contains sterilized gloves. Holding her hands straight up (like on all of your favorite medical shows before they perform surgery), she masterfully places one glove on and then flips the paper over to reveal the second glove and finally placing that glove on too. Once the blood is drawn, Phoebe sends off for the results, and I cross the hall to see my fast friend, Dr. Shahin. “Hey Mrs. Parker”, someone sings from the front desk. She immediately notices my new entourage. I confirm my peeps, and tell her “Yep, I roll deep.” After we exchange laughs, the nurse calls me back to be seen by Dr. Shahin. She asks me how I’ve managed over the last few weeks, questioning whether I’ve had side effects. “No nausea, only some headaches,” I reply. “No nausea?” She asks again.. None! After a minute or so, Dr. Shahin walks in. His smile is bigger than mine. “You look really good Mrs Parker. I love to see my patients like this! How are you feeling. I hear you’ve had no nausea?” We converse for about twenty minutes, and I am left with the following:
No nausea after the first session is a very good sign. Most people that struggle with nausea will have it after the first session. The side effects tend to subside after the first session as the body begins to adjust. (Y’all keep praying on this. 🙏🏾)
Headaches can be managed with Tylenol, but I am to be aware of how many I take each week. He would like to know if it’s a problem that needs to be investigated further. Tylenol is not obstructive to chemotherapy; however it does masks fevers so I will need to take my temperature before I pop a pill.
Spas are ok.. Just use common sense. This is awesome because I just received a gift certificate to the spa. Of course, I also need to be selective with what kind of spa that I venture to. To which I reply, “Dr. Shahin .. look at me. Do I LOOK like I am going to a hole in the wall spa?” Some things you just don’t sacrifice!
No restrictions on exercise. Listen to my body! It will tell me when I am overdoing it. Now for me, I need to set this baseline ahead of time. I am not willing to rely on Tova to listen to my body in the moment.. It’s a good thing that I have this good ole Apple Watch that can help me to set some targets.. (Yeah, sorry. Again, I’m an ExxonMobil Engineer.. we love metrics)
He tells me that we need to schedule my initial post-chemo ultrasound before the 3rd chemo session. There, we will start to develop a trend to determine the effectiveness of the chemotherapy. Well, since trending is another ExxonMobil favorite, I tell him. “you can’t develop a trend with only 2 data points.. That’s a line segment, not a trend.” He laughs hysterically, and says “I have to choose my words carefully around you. I’d forgotten that you are an engineer.” (FACTS! Now, back to the trending.) So I ask him, “So what do you think I am going to ask you next?” (This was really a test to see if we were on the same page. And of course he passes with flying colors!” (The first person to guess the question gets a prize. Email me at tova@prettysic.com and tell me what you think) We schedule our next appointment in two weeks, and I return to the Infusion center, but not before taking our Treatment 2 selfie ..
🎤 Put two fingers in the air .. lemme see you put two fingers in the air..
We walk back over to the Infusion center, and one of my fav nurses, Katherine is there. We briefly catch up before I show her the selfie that she’d missed with the other nurses in Dr. Shahin’s office. She says we’ll have to do a do-over in two weeks. I’m game. Come on, when have I ever turned down an opportunity to capture a memory?!?!
You get a ticket. You get a ticket. Every body gets a ticket to the chemo -party ! (well not really, but I just wanted to harness my inner-Oprah)
Back in my digs, Phoebe awaits to let me know that most of my lab work is complete. She said that they look good so far, they were just waiting on one final confirmation before they could order my chemo meds. Girl, I’m not worried. Those results are A1 👌🏾. He already told me that I would be done with treatment #2 TODAY. So, go on and get the rest of the results. When she returns a few minutes later, she tells me that it’s a go, but warned that my hemoglobin levels (common side effect of chemo) were low so I needed to watch for shortness of breath, rapid heart beat, and extreme signs of fatigue. Ok, got it! I will be mindful. Let’s get this party started.
You guys know the drill. Same as last time around .. I get pre-meds (including anti-nausea and steroids) while chemo meds are being mixed. We start at about 2 and finish at 4:30. But the company that I had made the time fly by. I always pack a bag of things to keep me busy, and I never get to them. That’s a great thing! It’s great to be in great company. We talk about memories, my journey, and activated faith .. all with love and humor. (My grandmother’s mouth is slicker than mine. She is quick with the wit, and I love it!) I also pass the time by responding to the many messages that I receive from my village, and of course the phone calls from the hubs. I don’t know about your family, but we do this thing as a unit. If am going through, we all are going through. And that’s why you saw Theo, Mom, and Tamara at the first session, and my grandmother, cousin, and aunt at today’s session. It takes a village. We are not meant to go through life’s trials and tribulations alone. So when you see a friend or family member in need of some help (even if they tell you that they are “ok”), do what you would want done for you.
Let me leave you with a funny story. About a week or so ago, I decided that for every act of kindness that I received, I would return that energy back to the universe. Now, this does not mean that I planned to get a gift, give a gift .. receive a card, give a card. No, no, no. I called myself keeping track of all of the acts of kindness that I knew about (only in number, not by name), so I could give back.. To whom much is given, much is expected, right? Well, honey.. these acts just started to take on a life of their own. I’m talking about cards in the mailbox, packages at the door, flowers being delivered, more food than I should have been eating, emails, texts, messages, calls, letters, and on and on an on… It’s like He was laughing at me. I explained this phenomenon to my grandmother today, and she quite simply said “Girl, don’t you know that you can’t outmatch God’s blessings.” I guess that’s why she’s the elder, and I am the grand-daughter. Good night!
